Being a dog on the Internet

The old joke about being online was that nobody knew you were a dog on the Internet.

Not true, and not even desirable, for a particular Jack Russell Terrier.

Lily is the canine mascot for MtnRanks.com. She loves chasing bikes. And, as you might have guessed, she’s gone viral. Here’s “Lily at Trailside.”





As if that isn’t enough notoriety, she’s been on Facebook since November 2011, as Lily Pad Downard, where she says:

“… I love the outdoors and action sports. I love to chase bikes, hike, tour in the snow, and climb rocks. I love to travel and ride with my head out the car window. In my spare time I love to eat rocks and chase cats.”

So, like many things in life, the pendulum has swung. Being a dog on the Internet is no longer a bad thing or something to hide. These days, it’s pretty cool. And you can sell T-shirts.

DIY music

Who hasn’t dreamed of being a singer in a band? I certainly did, once upon a time.

But it was only a dream. I had no guitar. No band buddies. No singing voice.

Fast forward to today. You don’t need a band, or even an instrument, to be a star. All you need is an idea, some courage, and a bit of talent. Technology can stand in for the rest.

• THePETEBOX is billed as “one of the world's finest human beatboxers.” With just himself and some recording magic, he produces a rich sound that spins around in your head, sprints through your body, and keeps you moving.
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•  Then there’s Reggie Watts, an amazing beatboxer/comedian/performer. There’s a little bit of all three in his TED talk, “Reggie Watts disorients you in the most entertaining way.”
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•  And for those of you who ever wanted to be the fifth Beatle, here’s your shot. Paul McCartney’s website allows visitors to remix some of the old faves. It's a hoot; give it a try.
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Once again, technology is reframing our reality, creating greater access for greater numbers of people. Many of whom are quite musical...and entertaining.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Remembering quick foxes, lazy dogs, and good boys

Driving through a wooded area the other day, I crested a hill and caught sight of a fox. We had a moment’s stare-down before I remembered to brake, and he remembered to scramble.

Through my rear-view mirror I saw him run across the road and disappear into the woods.

My first thought? “I wonder if that quick brown fox will jump over a lazy dog.”

It happens like that. Those memory aids I learned long ago will suddenly pop into my head, and I’ll be able to recite the whole thing without hesitation.



I must have typed the phrase --"The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog" – about a gazillion times in typing class because it has every letter in the alphabet.

I also know that “Every Good Boy Deserves Favor,” because it helped me remember the musical notes in the lines of the treble staff in sheet music: E,G,B,D,F. (That's about as far as I ever got in my musical career.) 

And to this day, my sister and I can still sing a duet of that mindless jingle about where not to cross the street .

Now, if only I could bulk erase all those old-time memories clogging up my mental cache. Maybe then I could remember all my Internet passwords.

 

More Steadicam, please

I recently went to the movies and was made sick by what I saw. Really. Churning stomach, spinning sensation, headachy sick.

I wasn’t watching slasher flicks or dark tales of sadistic torture. I was watching trailers for upcoming action movies. Make that upchucking action movies -- ones I’ll be sure not to see as full-length feature films.

Maybe move makers think they have to pack all the action into 60 seconds to draw in viewers. Me? I want to know more about the story and the characters; the chase itself has become a given. In fact, I mentally check out during chase scenes anyway -- tires screech, cars crash, things go boom -- as I wait for the more interesting parts of the movie to reappear.

But no matter the movie, it’s the movie-making techniques that are becoming a major distraction. Just because the technology exists to make things swoop and swoon, you really don’t want to make your audience do so.

All the CGI special-effects stuff should support the actors, not become the star. The audience should pay no attention to the wizards behind the curtain.

For my recent night at the movies, I saw The Hunger Games. My two words of advice for the movie makers: more Steadicam. Going for fast and gritty is one thing; inducing motion sickness in your audience is just bad business.