Friday, March 7, 2014

Winter? My Bad


I’m headed toward the light.

With Daylight Saving Time this weekend and spring officially two weeks away, longer days are already evident and my spirits are on the rise.

This winter has been a record-breaker. For some, it was a back-breaker.

In Philadelphia and elsewhere, there has been more snow more often and with more variety than ever I can remember: snow storms, ice storms, even thundersnow.

For this I say, I’m sorry. It’s my fault.

Years ago, after a three-foot snowfall, I bought a snow rake for the roof. It was supposed to prevent structural and water damage from heavy snow and ice dams. Because I was so well prepared for the next big snow, it didn’t snow at all, or maybe just a dusting, for the next several years. I ended up refitting that snow rake as a long-handled window washer to reach the second floor.

My friends have stopped inviting me to cross-country ski weekends in the mountains because whenever I show up, the trails are bare and there’s no snow in the forecast.

Well, this year I took the hint. I refused to buy snow tires for my car. I didn’t even look at new winter coats. I gave away old thermal undershirts that had been clogging my drawers.

Then winter hit, with a vengeance.

I can only express my sincere apologies. And promise that next year, I’ll be better armed to deal with ice and snow and sleet and freezing temperatures. I'll get snow tires, replace old snow shovels, polish up my skis, and buy all-weather boots.

That should be just the trick for ensuring a mild and enjoyable winter for all next year.

You’re welcome.

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